1.) Dumb-ass sitting next to me whispers (loudly) to girlfriend/date/fellow teeny-bopper – “I hate to say this, but I think “this” is going to happen.”
Proceeds to tell her what he thinks is going to happen —-> 15 minutes later, said thing happens (which was obvious). Whispers (loudly) to girlfriend/date/fellow teeny-bopper – “Yep, I called it!” (Mentally, I stood and gave him an ovation)
2.) Every single night-time scene in the movie – Audience stirs and mumble nervous jargon to one another. Whispers echo throughout the movie theater in 7.1 surround sound:
I thought everyone would embrace the night scenes instead of dread them, defeats the purpose of film. What the hell did you expect!?
4.) Silent, ambient moment in the film —-> Some jerk – “Boo!” (he and friends chuckle as if it were funny) I clench my fists, close my eyes and take a deep breath!
5.) After “Night #5″ in film, various establishing shots of cameras setup throughout the house/property are shown for, you guessed it, the fifth time. Again, dumb-ass sitting next to me whispers – “Yeah, yeah, we know you have a front door! Yes, we know you have a pool. Let me guess, kitchen? (kitchen shown on screen and he lifts his arms up in frustration and shakes his head) See, I knew it!” (Mentally, I toss an imaginary grenade in his direction!)
6.) Silent moment in film —-> Aforementioned jerk yells, “Oh yeah!” in his best Pauly D. (Jersey Shore) impression [he and his friends chuckle]
7.) Jump scare moment —–> Girl seated in front of me is so “jolted” that she presses her seat back violently and into my knees! I bite my tongue. She doesn’t turn around to apologize, instead she giggles with her tweeny friends!
8.) Silent Moment in film —-> Again, jerk in the back of the theater shouts, “Boo!” A good Samaritan shouts, “Not funny!” Tween girlfriend responds with, “Yes it was!” (friends chuckle)
9.) Film concludes, FADE TO BLACK. Audience is left in darkness for what seems like a few minutes – 7.1 Surround Sound again form the audience:
Of course, nothing happens! ROLL CREDITS!!
I’d like to personally thank the “Tweens” of Poughkeepsie, NY for nearly ruining the movie experience for me. Good job guys and gals!
When I saw the trailer for Army of Darkness in 1993, I was at a loss. It featured our brazen hero, Ash, once again battling the horrific deadites, only they didn’t look so horrific this time around. There were moments that made me chuckle a bit.
What is this and why am I laughing? This is not The Evil Dead, this is Army of Darkness! I was 13 years old and on the brink of my freshman year in high school. Since the time between Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness, I wised up a bit, what-with going to high school and all, so it was no surprise to me to take notice that there was something different about this new installment into the franchise.
My brain screamed, “Noooooooo!”
First, they opted out of using the words “Evil” and “Dead” in the title and our hero, Ash, was now a loud-mouthed comedian! In said year, 1993, I was not purvey to the plethora of information that the internet now provides us. So I knew close to nothing about director Sam Raimi and his cohorts. I didn’t know that they were huge fans of “The Three Stooges” nor that many of their collegiate shorts were comedic in nature. Of course, I should’ve taken note of that with Evil Dead II but c’mon, I mean, I was seven!
Unofficially, it was The Evil Dead III but, as I found out years later, the change in title had something to do with Hollywood politics that I won’t get into for the sake of the blog entry.
There was a common denominator in this story as with my previous two entries regarding the first two films in the Evil Dead series… my dad. Sure, I could’ve taken the train to my local movie theater on 181st Street in Manhattan, however, it wasn’t playing there. So, again, I asked my dad to take me. I enjoyed going to the movies with my father but I knew this movie wasn’t his cup of tea. To my surprise, he agreed to take me and off we went to United Artists Movieland in Yonkers, NY right off of Central Avenue.
There was nothing special about the movie theater from an architectural standpoint and was actually, what most would consider, bare. Still, it was a theater in which my father and I frequented on many occasions having watched movies such as Robocop, The Believers, Predator, Back to the Future II, Batman, etc, etc. It was a personal favorite of ours having been conveniently located near a Dragon’s Den and a Bradlee’s! As you can see, there was “entertainment” abound from the the East and West as the theater was in the center of this strip mall.
There were many things about the movie that changed dramatically from its predecessors, namely the overall tone of the film. Where we saw a mixture of both horror and comedy in Evil Dead II, Army of Darkness seemed to have been an all out comedy. Was I happy about this? No, not initially. But, with time (about 30 minutes into the movie) I found myself digging this installment.
At the film’s conclusion, I remember trying to fit all the pieces together. Was this indeed part the Evil Dead series? Why did it make me laugh? And why was there a marching band of the dead? Surely, there was a mistake, right?
Nope!
Was there to be more? The end of Army of Darkness certainly left open the possibilities of another sequel and The Evil Dead IV was inevitable… or so I thought. For years there have been rumors that Sam Raimi will helm a fourth sequel to the franchise. The rumors are still present to this day where Bruce Campbell has said he will do another sequel to the film so long as Raimi is on board. More likely than not, they probably just get a kick out of watching these rabid fans foam at the mouth. The bastards! Still love’ em though.
Sad to say but, our hero Ash has aged and I’d have to wonder if he can still pull off the many stunts and obstacles that young Ash had to endure during his first couple of stints with the Deadites. But then again, Harrison Ford was able to bring Indiana Jones back to life despite his lackluster and aged appearance.
Fast forward a couple of years and there was still no word on the fourth installment of The Evil Dead. By this time, a technological marvel was becoming very crucial to my everyday life… the World Wide Web. No longer did I have to wait for the latest issue of Fangoria to get the latest news on upcoming movies but all I had to do was sign up via 56k modem and hop on a newsgroup where unconfirmed rumors were plentiful. Still, the Evil Dead IV was (and still is) in Hollywood limbo and all I can do is hope that one day it will be released to the eagerly awaiting fan base.
Still 6 years old and I’m already hooked on The Evil Dead and yearn for more! The date was March 13, 1987 and Evil Dead II: Dead by Dawn was just released into US cinemas. It was a significant date, not only because Evil Dead II was out, but because it was a Friday! How cool would it have been to say that I saw the Evil Dead sequel on Friday the 13th? All of my 6 year old friends would be jealous!
I begged and begged my father to take me to go see it. He scoffed at the idea of wasting hard-earned money watching a cheesy movie in the theaters. Still, I egged on until he finally caved in. Nothing like giving an annoying, bratty child what he wants just to shut him up. So there I was, Friday (the 13th!) night amped up and ready to go. I don’t remember what time it was, but I do remember that it was dark out. My nerves were tingling, a combination of both excitement and fear. Contrary to popular belief, scary movies did scare me as a child, although my close friends and family would probably find that hard to believe. My cousin was over that night who’s a couple of years my senior, which made him about 10 or 11 years old at that time. My dad grabbed his jacket and I heard the sound of a set of keys scraping against the surface of a wooden table-top and jingle as hey made their way into his coat jacket. Yes, here we go! We all grabbed our jackets and headed for the front door to meet my father there. There was a smile on my face that would put The Joker to shame. My eyes were wide-eyed and either shouted, “Let’s go already!” or I looked like a crazed, cocaine-induced 7 year old!
I quickly walked to the front door as I heard the locks being turned and opened. Everything moved in slow motion. My cousin and older brother were close behind, but I made sure to lead the pack so that I can call “shotgun” and have that front seat in the car beside my father. I wasn’t the oldest, but, so what! The door flew open and we were ready to go. My father turned around and looked at us, then, his face changed. It was a puzzled look. He looked me and asked, “Where are you going?” It was at that moment that I realized that I wasn’t going to see the Evil Dead II that night. Oh, I was very disappointed and did like any normal 6 year old would do, I cried and banged my head against the wall until all of my frustration was out of my system and the wall bore a hallow hole.
So, I didn’t get to watch it on the 13th like I had hoped for. Instead, my dad took me the following morning to the Coliseum Cinema on 181st Street in Washington Heights, (Manhattan) NY. I had a hard time sleeping the night before as I could not contain my excitement! Before I knew it, my eyes came to life. Outside, I could hear the birds chirping and the subway roaring to a start as it departed the station just down the road. Then, as if realizing that it was day, my eyes widened and I jumped out of bed! I was awake by dawn!
Ok, so I had to settle for second best and watched it on Saturday the 14th. Still, I was now moments away from watching the Evil Dead II!
Here is the Theater circa 1986 courtesy of American Classic Images (www.americanclassicimages.com) One year prior to Evil Dead II release
It was a bright, sunny morning but the cold that accompanied could have fooled anyone. It was, after all, March in New York. The old, unwelcoming theater beckoned and spoke to me. It said, “Get your ass in here already!” It was an old theater that dated back to the 1920′s and, once inside, it showed. At the time, there was little decor that adorned the main lobby and it was, well, bare and decrepit. Because of this bareness, it lent for an eerie, creepy atmosphere that was reminiscent of an old, haunted opera house (not that I’d ever been in one). At that time of day, it was eerily quiet in the movie theater which only made the little hairs on the back of neck rise and had me peeking around every corner on our short trek into the theater in which it was playing.
Inside the screening room, although deteriorating, the place was a marvel to look at with its ornate architectural designs. What once was a stage theater with orchestra seating, the screening room was divided into two for the purposes of making it into a movie theater. It was apparent by looking up at the ceiling where one can see the old remnants of a dome on the ceiling. Either way, at 6 years old, the place scared the crap out of me.
The already dimmed lights dimmed even further and before I knew it, we were sitting in darkness and the projector came to life. Evil Dead II was here! Unfortunately, I was a “wuss in disguise” in those days, meaning, I was scared but hid it well, or so I thought. I would do things such as look to the rear of the theater and look at the lights of the projector, asking my dad what it was because I just knew when something scary was about to happen. My father was no fool and caught on to my “tactics”. Of course, he would boast about how scared I was because I always proclaimed my love for horror movies.
Oh, how did this installment of the Evil Dead confuse the shit out of me! Again, there was my question of why the hell would Ash go back to the cabin after everything he went through?! It just didn’t make sense. Then, I thought, maybe it is a remake of the original film with a bigger budget. If it was, they sure as hell changed the shit out of it. And what’s more, despite my chicken-esque demeanor with a couple of scenes, I found myself chuckling at others. Hmm, a decapitated, deadite Linda ballet dancing in the woods in Ray Harryhausen-esque fashion ala Jason and the Argonauts. A possessed hand that is hell-bent on kicking its former occupants ass? What is there not to laugh at? It all just seemed, “groovy”! With the help of my father, he explained to me that it was a horror/comedy. What?! Comedy? This is not the Evil Dead! This was before I could truly appreciate the films for what they were, very much so in the same fashion as Drag me to Hell.
Despite my admittedly being scared in some parts, there were more than a few moments that made me laugh. Ok, I didn’t understand why, but OK! I was still loving the movie!
I was a walking, talking oxymoron. But, I got say I saw Evil Dead II: Dead by Dawn in a movie theater! Did I just give testament of how old I am? Hmm, not sure if that’s something to boast about! Still, to this day, my father makes fun of me whenever we talk or reminisce and I still bitch about how he didn’t take me to see it on opening night. In the end, we both had the last laugh. Him, because he witnessed the wuss in me and, me, because I got him to take me to the movies to see the film. I think I was the clear winner in this case!
